The whys of life...and TRUST

I love Google.  I am interning at Channel 8 this semester, and one of my responsibilities is to monitor the switchboard/front desk for an hour on the days that I’m there.  This morning, a gentleman called and asked me for a number which I had no earthly idea how to locate.  I calmly asked him to wait while I pulled up Google, typed in the equivalent of How am I supposed to find a contact number for this company? and within I had the desired digits. 

My addiction to Google may borderline on pathetic, but it helps me explain things I can’t understand.  It gives me answers when I don’t have the right ones.  Tonight, I don’t have a lot of answers.  I don’t know why something called cancer exists.  I don’t know why it can break the youngest and the best.  I don’t know why it is about to take the life of one of my friends…unless God chooses to act and work the miracle I selfishly long to see.  

When my roommate Cheyenne called me this afternoon and gave me the update on our friend's rapidly declining condition, all I could think was Why?  The above whys and many others started swirling around in my head.  I didn’t have answers to them, and I knew I couldn’t find them on Google.

I’m at work tonight, and the tornadoes in the area have kept all the smart people in Knoxville away from the gym.  The quieter-than-usual atmosphere has given me the chance to pray…and think.  I’ve thought about why I have so many whys, and why I probably won’t get all the answers to them this side of heaven.

When it comes down to it, the remedy for the unanswered why’s of life is found in TRUST.  Trust in God.  Trust in Jeremiah 29:11 – even when everything around us is screaming that it can’t be true.  For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, Plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you a hope and a future.  Trust is making the choice to believe this, even when your head – and maybe everyone around you – is screaming out that you shouldn’t.  

Can you guess what I did when I started meditating on the word trust?  Yep…I Google-ed.  And my bff provided the following definition from Merriam-Webster: an assured reliance on the character, ability, strength, or truth of someone or something. 

In hindsight, it’s always amazing how God prepares those He loves for the day ahead…whatever it may bring.  The Jesus Calling devotional I am reading this year had the following quote for today’s passage: The level of peace you experience corresponds with the level of trust you have in Me.  

Trust.  Reliance that is assured, steadfast, on the unchanging, constant character of God.  Reliance on His strength and power.  Reliance in the truth that He is acting out of a love for His children that cannot be measured.  Reliance in the truth that He is acting in their best interest…even though it doesn’t look like it at the moment.  

Here’s another definition for trust that Merriam-Webster provided: something committed or entrusted to one to be used or cared for in the interest of another.

Did you catch that?!  We can entrust our faith, our hope, our love to our Father because He is trustworthy.  He won’t manipulate our trust or take advantage of it.  He will guard it, and it will ultimately serve in our best interest.  

Be careful for nothing, but in everything, by prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, let your requests be made known unto God.  And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, will keep your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.  (Philippians 4:6,7)

The peace He provides – which we experience in correspondence with the amount of trust we place in Him – is unexplainable.  It transcends all human understanding.  We won’t be able to fathom why we have it when everything around us is screaming that we shouldn’t.  

But we can.  No matter what circumstances we find ourselves in the middle of, He is greater.  His peace extends to the most violent, most devastating of them all and longs to encompass us.  All we have to do is trust Him.

What's Your Birthright?

Hey friends!

I felt the urge to write down  the following ramblings from my quiet time the other morning.  I pray some of it will be relevant to whatever you're going through this week, or this season of your life!  Enjoy them...and enjoy this WEDNESDAY from the WORD!

“Is not the Lord your God with you?  And hath He not given you rest on every side?  For He hath given the inhabitants of the land into Mine Hand; and the land is subdued before the Lord, and before His people.  Now set your heart and your soul to seek the Lord your God…” – 1 Chronicles 22:18-19

My favorite song by Casting Crowns is Who Am I?  Take a moment to read these beautiful lyrics:

Who am I, that the Lord of all the earth

Would care to know my name

Would care to feel my hurt

Who am I, that the Bright and Morning Star

Would choose to light the way

For my ever wandering heart…

Who am I, that the eyes that see my sin

Would look on me with love and watch me rise again

Who am I, that the voice that calmed the sea

Would call out through the rain

And calm the storm in me?

Not because of who I am

But because of what You've done

Not because of what I've done

But because of who You are.

I am a flower quickly fading

Here today and gone tomorrow

A wave tossed in the ocean

Vapor in the wind

Still You hear me when I'm calling

Lord, You catch me when I'm falling

And You've told me who I am

I am Yours. 

Hearing this song and reading the verses from 1 Chronicles this morning, I was reminded of the following passage from Psalms: “The lines are fallen unto me in pleasant places…Thou wilt shew me the path of life: in Thy presence is fullness of joy; at Thy right hand there are pleasures for evermore.” – Psalm 16:6,11

Solomon must have felt awed by what his father, King David, told him.  Because of David’s tireless work and great effort, Solomon was able to live in peace and focus his attention on building the House of God.  Because David had battled and fought great wars, Solomon was able to live in peace.  I’m sure Solomon must have wondered, “Why me?  Why have the lines fallen for me in such pleasant places?  Why am I the lucky one?”

On the flip side, I wonder what David thought.  “As hard as I’ve served the Lord; as close as I am to Him; as much as He calls me a man after His own heart; why not me?  Why have I not been chosen for this great task?”  David might have had these passing thoughts, but his actions revel that he didn’t dwell on them (1 Chronicles 22:14-16).   Instead, he did everything in his power to help Solomon, making his son’s task as easy as possible.

In church this past Sunday morning, my Pastor discussed the text from Genesis 25:29-34, where Esau despised his birthright and sold it to his brother Jacob for a single meal: lentil stew and bread.  For instant gratification that lasted only a few minutes, Esau gave in the lifelong blessings and privileges of his birthright.  Pastor Dan explained that we, as children of God, likewise have a Christian birthright.  We are privy to the riches and rights of our Heavenly Father! (Romans 8:17) In addition, we each have a spiritual birthright, a spiritual gift that God has specially endowed to each of His children.  For some it might be ministry; for others it might be a career; the list can go on and on.

But each of us is guilty of following in Esau’s steps.  We have succumbed to our hunger pains; desiring fulfillment in the moment, we have been willing to give up whatever our birthright is for our own version of lentil stew.  Satan knows what our weak points are.  They look different for each of us, and he want use the weakness of person A to tempt person B.  He is much to cleaver for that (1 Peter 5:8).  Because of that, we must constantly be on guard, never naively assuming we are above falling into sin and capable of trading in our God-given birthright. 

I encourage you to prayerfully consider what God has given you.  What is he calling you to today, this semester, this year…for your lifetime?  Claim that birthright.  God is fighting for you; and if He is on your side, nothing and no one can get in your way (Psalm 46:1-3, Romans 8:31)!  What a promise!

You might be like Solomon.  Your life may look beautiful and carefree.  Thank God for that, and use your smooth life for His glory.  Or you might be like David.  You life might be full of wars and battle scars.  Don’t resent God for them, and don’t resent the “Solomons” around you for their bump-less lives.  Whatever your birthright is, whatever God is calling you to, trust that He in His sovereignty has lovingly and carefully selected that for you.  Who are we to know what that is, what our life should look like?! 

I had dinner with my dear friend Allison last night.  As I was sharing with her my current frustration with my convoluted life, and how confused I was that none of my jobs and internships to date made sense with my future career goals, she said this to me: “God may want you to serve Him for the rest of your life doing odd jobs rather than having a prestigious, lifelong career.  That may be how He is most glorified through you.  And don’t rob Him of His glory!”

Wow.  I’m still in the process of digesting that, of taking it all in.  One thing I do know:  I don’t want to rob God of His glory, the glory I am privileged enough to play a part in.  And whatever He is calling me to that brings Him glory, that’s what I want to do. 

Father, give me the strength to do nothing as I let you be God (Psalm 46:10).  Give me the peace to rest in You with open hands – resting in Your plan as You take or put in them whatever you see fit.  

Redemption

Hey, Friends!
Redemption is such a beautiful word.  It denotes rescue; salvation from something that is far bigger than anything we can handle on our own.  We each need to be rescued: from ourselves, from our circumstances, from our selfish ambitions that get us stuck in the mindset that life is all about us.

Last fall was the hardest semester of my life.  For the first several months, my priorties were completely messed up.  I took my eyes off Jesus and tried to find my value and worth in a relationship I desperately wanted; in having my future career all mapped out; in the acceptance and approval of those I loved.  All of the above fell through.  The boy found someone else; I found out I didn't want to use the major I was studying for the rest of my life; I felt devauled , insignificant, irreplaceable, and easly forgotten by others. 

When I finally bottomed out, Jesus was patiently waiting to scoop me up.  I stumbled across Psalm 73 one day and it changed my life.  In the first part, Asaph is bemoaning his lot in life.  He is absolutely miserable; everyone around him is in tall cotton and it seems as though he is the only one who has been betrayed, the only one who has had his heart ripped out.  He knew God was good, but everything in his life contradicted that belief:

Surely God is good to Israel,
   to those who are pure in heart.
 ² But as for me, my feet had almost slipped;
   I had nearly lost my foothold.
³ For I envied the arrogant
   when I saw the prosperity of the wicked.
 ⁴ They have no struggles;
   their bodies are healthy and strong.
⁵ They are free from common human burdens;
   they are not plagued by human ills.
⁶ Therefore pride is their necklace;
   they clothe themselves with violence.
⁷ From their callous hearts comes iniquity;
   their evil imaginations have no limits.
⁸ They scoff, and speak with malice;
   with arrogance they threaten oppression.
⁹ Their mouths lay claim to heaven,
   and their tongues take possession of the earth.
¹⁰ Therefore their people turn to them
   and drink up waters in abundance.
¹¹ They say, “How would God know?
   Does the Most High know anything?”
 ¹² This is what the wicked are like—
   always free of care, they go on amassing wealth.

The cry of Asaph's heart was a heart-rending "Why?!"  He had done everything right; he had tried so hard to be the best he could be, to bring glory to his God by living a righteous life...and for what?

¹³ Surely in vain I have kept my heart pure
   and have washed my hands in innocence.
¹⁴ All day long I have been afflicted,
   and every morning brings new punishments.
 ¹⁵ If I had spoken out like that,
   I would have betrayed your children.

But at this point, when Asaph hit rock bottom, he finally had no one, nothing else to look at but Jesus.  Because he had been stripped of everything, his perspective was finally able to be centered on the only One who should have been that priority in the first place.

¹⁶ When I tried to understand all this,
   it troubled me deeply
¹⁷ till I entered the sanctuary of God;
   then I understood their final destiny.
 ¹⁸ Surely you place them on slippery ground;
   you cast them down to ruin.
¹⁹ How suddenly are they destroyed,
   completely swept away by terrors!
²⁰ They are like a dream when one awakes;
   when you arise, Lord,
   you will despise them as fantasies.

Asaph realized that God had stripped him away of all the destractions to save him; to redeem him by showing that He is the only One who could feel that void in his life.  In brokenness and joy, Asaph confesses and offers praise to God for his rescue.

 ²¹ When my heart was grieved
   and my spirit embittered,
²² I was senseless and ignorant;
   I was a brute beast before you.
 ²³ Yet I am always with you;
   you hold me by my right hand.
²⁴ You guide me with your counsel,
   and afterward you will take me into glory.
²⁵ Whom have I in heaven but you?
   And earth has nothing I desire besides you.
²⁶ My flesh and my heart may fail,
   but God is the strength of my heart
   and my portion forever.
 ²⁷ Those who are far from you will perish;
   you destroy all who are unfaithful to you.
²⁸ But as for me, it is good to be near God.
   I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge;
   I will tell of all your deeds.

God is not trying to harm us.  He is a rewarder.  And something He has revealed to me over the past two months is that He is a rewarder even when we don't deserve it!  How beautiful is that?!  Your life right now may be miserable.  It may seem as though He is up in Heaven taunting you, maliciously thinking up yet another trial that will bring you even more hurt, even more pain.  Friends, there is no truth in that mindset whatsoever!  It is an outright LIE.  The truth is that your Father is crazy about you and wants to bless your socks off!  But He can't bless your life until He is the center of your life.  When He is, everything else - relationships, career, school, you name it - will fall into place exactly where it should be.

One of my dear friends, Brittany, shared this beautiful book expert with me today.  The passage perfectly sums up these thoughts.

"Why did God curse Eve with loneliness and heartache, an emptiness that nothing would be able to fill? Wasn't her life going to be hard enough out there in the world, banished from the Garden that was her true home, her only home, never able to return? It seems unkind. Cruel, even.

He did it to SAVE her. For as we all know personally, something in Eve's heart shifted at the Fall. Something sent its roots down deep into her soul-- and ours-- that mistrust of God's heart, that resolution to find life on our own terms. So God has to thwart her. In love, he has to block her attempts until, wounded and aching, she turns to him and him alone for her rescue.

Therefore I will block her bath with thornbushes;
I will wall her in so she cannot find her way.
She will chase after her lovers but not catch them;
she will look for them but not find them (Hos. 2:6-7)

Jesus has to thwart us too-- thwart our self- redemptive plans, our controlling and our hiding, thwart the ways we are seeking to fill the ache within us. Otherwise, we would never fully turn to him for our rescue. Oh, we might turn to him for our "salvation", for a ticket to heaven when we die. We might turn to him even in the form of Christian service, regular church attendance, a moral life. But inside, our hearts remain broken and captive and far from the One who can help us.

Wherever it is we have sought life apart from him, he disrupts our plans, our "way of life" which is not life at all."
He truly is a rewarder.  Everything He does to us, each joy or trial He sends our way, is done out of His unfathomable love.  He knows we can never experience true joy or life until He is at the center, and so He relentlessly pursues each of His children to bring it about.

Until Wednesday!
Amber Noel

101 in 1001

Happy Wednesday!

Well friends, I buckled to peer pressure and finally made my list of 101 things to do in 1001 days.  The heart behind this new trend is to take ownership of your life; to stop talking about how you need to do things "one day" or "when you get around to it", but to actively take steps to actually accomplish those things.  It's all about being proactive.

The dictionary defines proactive as an adjective for:

"Acting in advance to deal with an expected difficulty; anticipatory."

It's a given: life is going to through us curve balls.  We are going to have to deal with sucky situations that are difficult and unexpected.  But if we cultivate the habit of preparing ourselves to the best of our ability before those situations arise, we will be better able to face them.  

We shouldn't live in fear, but we should be alert.  We shouldn't think that we can have difficult situations all figured out because nothing will ever go as planned, but we should take whatever steps we can in the hear and now so that we can be wise stewards of the life we have been given.  How awful to reach the end of life and realize that we had wasted so much of it!  To realize that there were so many opportunities we let slip by because we just "didn't get around to it"!

"Therefore, stay awake, for you do not know on what day your Lord is coming.                                                                                                                                                                                         ~ Matthew 24:42 ~ 

Okay, here's my Bucket List for the next year and a half:

      

    1. Learn to play guitar

    2. Make homemade pizza

    3. Run the Boston Marathon

    4. Tell someone about Christ

    5. Ride a motorcycle

    6. Read all the Harry Potter books

    7. Choreograph my own dance…and perform it

    8.  Make a scrapbook

    9.  Go to the Bahamas

   10.  Change the oil in my car

   11.   French braid my hair

   12.  Memorize my bank account number

   13.  Go rock climbing

   14.  Fly in a noncommercial plane

   15.  Have a picnic

   16.  Ride the Ferris wheel at Navy Pier

   17.  Lie on a blanket outside and star gaze

   18.  Buy coffee for someone in line behind me

   19.  Get my AAAI PFI certification

   20.  Go to a spa

   21.  Hold a newborn baby

   22.  Drink a 5-hour Energy

   23.  Watch a sunrise and sunset in one setting

   24.  Snow ski in Colorado

   25.  Learn a magic trick

   26.  Dance in the rain

   27.  Go to a County Fair

   28.  Memorize a book of the Bible

   29.  Get my gun permit

   30.  Buy a meal for someone who’s homeless

   31.  Write a poem

   32.  Play laser tag

   33. Paint a room

   34.  Go swimming at midnight

   35.  Eat Dim Sum

   36.  Get my spinning certification

   37.  Volunteer at Montgomery Village

   38.  Paintball

   39.  Go to Paris, France

   40.  Have a granola party with my sister

   41.  Ride Superman

   42.  Visit an orphanage and play with babies

   43.  Cross stitch something

   44.  Go to Puppy Zone

   45.  Ring in the New Year in Times Square

   46.  Skype a friend

   47.  Paint a canvas

   48.  Ride a horse

   49.  Volunteer at Lost Sheep

   50.  Watch a UT vs. FL game in the Swamp

   51.  Be in a wedding

   52.  Give someone a hug

   53.  Make pancakes with my roommates

   54.  Ride a scary roller coaster with my hands up the entire time

   55.  Send someone a handwritten letter

   56.  Have a Disney movie marathon

   57.  Go to the Grand Canyon

   58.  Call an old friend

   59.  Swing Dance

      60.  Go snorkeling

61.  Drink a homemade milkshake

      62.  Go through Ayres Hall

      63.  Graduate college

      64.  Go to Niagara Falls

      65.  Do a triathlon

      66.  Go scuba diving

      67.  Take a back road with my car windows down

      68. Change a tire

      69.  Learn the dance routine for Thriller

      70.  Drive a stick shift

      71.  Jet ski at Tablerock Lake

      72.  Bring a friend breakfast in bed

      73.  Go to a Lady Antebellum concert

      74.  Give someone a back massage

      75.  Laugh until I cry and start to hyperventilate

       76.  Play in the fountains at World’s Fair Park

       78.  Bake bread

       79.  Take ballroom dancing classes

       80.  Go white water rafting

       81.  Surprise someone at work

       82.  Have a photo-shoot

       83.  Make cheesecake

       84.  Watch Forest Gump in its entirety

       85.  Mattress surf

       86.  Write a book

 87.  Play a round of golf 

       88.  Watch fireworks over water

       89.  Slide down a banister

       90.  Watch all the Lord of the Rings movies

       91.  Tie-Dye a t-shirt

       92.  Travel to Washington, D.C. and NYC on the Megabus

       93.  Buy a pair of chacos

       94. Go to a Zumba class

       95. Play Ultimate Frisbee

       96. Take a cooking class

       97. Rock on the front porch with a good friend

       98. Tell someone she’s beautiful

       99. Throw a surprise party

     100. Play hide-and-seek outside

     101. Learn Jesus Loves Me in Creole

     

          This list begins today, August 10 2011 and will hopefully be completed by May 6, 2014!  Proactivity has to start somewhere, and for me it might as well begin with this list.  Updates will be posted as they are completed, so stay tuned. :)

     

     ~Amber Noel