Dying for Approval

Oh hey friends!
No, it's not Wednesday.  But I finally have a free moment to blog and the word for the week is just too good not to share...so here's the Word on Saturday!

Yesterday, I was asked to lead my small group Bible study tomorrow night.  This inspired me to read through my journal from last semester and this summer, reminding myself of things God has taught me over the past few months that could encourage others.  If it's been a while since you re-read your musings and ramblings on paper, go do it.  You will be amazed at the theme you see over a period of time of what God is trying to teach you!  For me, the theme is that of approval.

Spring semester of my freshman year, my discipler called me out for being a people-pleaser.  She read Galatians 1:10 to me. "For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God?  Or am I trying to please man?  If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ."  Apparently, I'm a slow learner because my journal entries from the past semester made it clear that seeking the approval of others is something I still struggle with.

People-pleasers are usually viewed as those who are indecisive with seemingly no opinions of their own.  They  are so worried about not stepping on other people's toes that they don't want to rock the boat by voicing an opposing view.  People-pleasers are often referred to as pushovers and people with no backbone.  By that definition, you might instantly think of a friend who never says which restaurant she wants to go to or what movie he really wants to watch.  Maybe you are the person who does that, and the one that came to your mind!

Whatever person you thought of, I encourage you to put a spin on the traditional definition of people-pleasers and see if you find yourself in that category.  Perhaps you're someone who feels tied down to a major you can't stand, or to a career you aren't passionate about.  But because you don't want others to view the past x-amount of years as a "waste", you trudge along with something that is clearly not your life's calling.  Maybe you have been prompted to share your faith with a co-worker or friend, but hesitate because you wonder what he would say if you did.  Or perhaps you feel led to pursue something completely different from anything you have ever done before that you know will bring you life, but are afraid to turn from the path you're currently on because you think others would call you a quitter or cop out.

Did any of the above ring true of your life?  I can identify with them all...and many, many more.  It's so funny that we continue to run after the fluctuating, inconsistent approval of men when the liberating truth is that there is only One whose approval we should seek.  Wouldn't it be freeing if we only tried to please one person?!  The good news is that we can!  And His name is Jesus Christ!

As I write this tonight, the cry of my heart is that of Song of Solomon 3:4.  "When I found him whom my soul loves, I held him, and would not let him go."  I want this verse to describe my pursuit of Christ.  So often, I loose focus by wondering, "What will the person across from me think if I pray by myself in public?"  "Will we still be 'friends' if I share my faith with him?"  "Will she think I'm 'over the top' if I follow through with my convictions instead of following the status quo?"  I might do the right thing in these situations.  But I am still distracted from running the race when I get caught up in trying to win the approval of others while still trying to follow Christ.  I want to run as hard and as fast as I can after Jesus, completely oblivious to the opinions of others along the way.

It's so freeing to live only for Christ, to seek the approval of the only One whose opinion is eternal!  But the results of it don't guarantee that everyone will love us and want to be our friends.  If that happens, you're probably doing something wrong.  But Jesus promised that when we lift Him up, He will draw others to Himself (John 12:32).  People will notice your changed life.  They'll notice how happy, restful, and free you are because you're not running yourself ragged trying to win their approval.  And they'll ask you what the difference is.  "What is you beloved more than another beloved?  What is your beloved more than another beloved, that you thus adjure us?"  (Song of Solomon 5:9).  When that happens, let's seize the opportunity to point them Jesus Christ, the One whose approval we should be dying for!  "He is altogether desirable.  This is my beloved and this is my friend."  (5:16)

Until next Wednesday - for real this time.
Amber Noel